October 20th, 2016

Not Feeling It, But Not Certain How It Went

So I’ve completed my first midterm.  In fairness, it’s a midterm that is actually a final.  In Research Methods, the midterm is the final and the rest of the semester will be lectures and work on the research design. This is the first test like this I’ve taken in 37 years.  I did take the GRE last year, but not a test in a class.

Here’s how I studied.  I reviewed the readings and the notes.  Attended a study group and got together with one of the other students to study. We even shared notes in sort of a digital study group.  I made the decision that memorizing the lists was not as important as understanding the concepts.  I was wrong.  And there were a couple of math related questions that I don’t have the background for yet.

I felt prepared but nervous when I got to class.  The professor came in and we handed in the summary of our research design (Note: Got feedback on the research design later in the evening and he liked it.  It needs work, but he liked it. I needed some good news today!)  and then he handed out the exam. I felt good about the multiple choice questions but the wording was different than I was used to. Then there were short answer questions and essay questions. I’m feeling about 50%.  After talking to my colleagues after class and my family members (there’s strength in numbers, you know). they all encouraged me by saying, “I’m sure you did better than you think you did!”  That wouldn’t be hard.

I felt so bad at the end of the test that I wrote a little note apologizing to my professor for my poor performance and promising I’ll get better.  I figure if I did well, he’ll think I just beat myself up like all overachievers do and if I did as poorly as I think I did, he’ll know I know it.

I feel like Scarlett O’Hara in “Gone with the Wind” with her life in shambles having lost everything, specifically, Rhett Butler. She said she’d think about it tomorrow, because tomorrow is another day.  And I’ll be back.